When one thinks of Christmas one usually envisions minty candy canes, twinkling lights, lively carols, jolly men…and monstrously huge granny panties? No? Well, you must not have had your share of Sabin Christmas fun then.

Every year we host a small Christmas get-together. The particulars of this festivity have changed through the years; what used to be a fancy candlelight dinner has turned into a relaxed informal gathering of friends. But through all the shifting party schemes one party favorite has remained: the white elephant gift exchange.

What a white elephant has to do with gifts that typically range from tacky to bizarre is beyond me but this classic Christmas game certainly unearths some timeless treasures. Power Klingon on cassette tape, golden pheasant sculptures, lice spray, headless nutcrackers, archaic computer manuals, brass knuckles…the list goes on and on. This year Brett was even fortunate enough to procure a very large pair of granny panties. Lucky!

In our version of the white elephant exchange all the gifts remain wrapped until the end. We find this method more amusing since oftentimes the gifts that are fought over most turn out to be quite absurd, like a pair of used socks from a guy with stinky feet or a half eaten box of cereal. Just what you’ve always wanted!

A pretty bow may disguise a loathsome gift: that’s the lesson one quickly learns from attending a Sabin Christmas party and I think it’s also the title of a James Bond theme song.

Merry Christmas everyone! May your brass knuckles be shiny and bright and your headless nutcracker a delight!