In keeping with the recommendations of health officials, last November Jason and I decided not to spend Thanksgiving with anyone but each other. While we missed our families, this odd arrangement did have a few advantages. This was the first year of the many we’ve been married in which Thanksgiving was not a blur of travel and intake. Plus, we were still able to connect with family members through a little technological resourcefulness. All in all, it was a peculiar but pleasant holiday.

As mentioned above, our resolve to be responsible with our Thanksgiving celebrations did have some perks. So, let’s talk perks. We got to try making dressing for the first time ever, a successful experiment. Also, we had delicious leftovers for a week and a half. At the expense of our BMI, we made it through all of them. Additionally, there were no timelines or schedules. After years of hitting two family meals on the same day, our holiday felt relaxing even though we were cooking a full Thanksgiving dinner. That’s an indication of how busy our Thanksgivings tend to be.

Surprisingly, although it was our first attempt at preparing a Thanksgiving feast, all of our food finished together on time. We had cranberry sauce, dressing, candied yams, smoked turkey, caramel apple pie, and sweet potato pie. Everything was made from scratch by us except the turkey and caramel apple pie. If someone wants to smoke a turkey for me, I won’t say no.

Since I am usually the dessert peddler at my family’s Thanksgiving gorging, Jason and I opted to give our families a little sweetness this year notwithstanding the bitter circumstances. We ordered nine apple pies from our favorite bakery and delivered one to each of our family members the day before the holiday in what we called our Pie Circuit. We stopped on lawns to talk with our relatives, so these simple deliveries took over five hours. I always think I’m going to start cooking for Thanksgiving early the day before, but I never do.

Jason and I also organized video calls and party games with both our families as a way to stay connected during our disconnection. Similarly, we planned a tournament for the game That’s Pretty Clever. Yup, that’s pretty clever.

Thanksgiving should conjure reflections of gratitude. This year, I was most grateful for my sole meal companion, who also happens to be one amazing hubby. I was also thankful for the technology that made moments of laughter and support with family still possible. However, after this unavoidably solitary Thanksgiving, I’m not sure I’m going to be able to go back to the double-family trauma. Holiday festivities don’t have to happen on actual holidays. Maybe the family togetherness can be spread out instead of occurring all together? I’m just saying.