Most of us have at least a few friends who would appreciate a cheeky Christmas gathering. For Jason and me, that group has been established for decades. Every year we hold a wacky holiday event with the same crowd. Here’s how it went last December.
One of the white elephants we contributed was lumberjack themed.
We had a gang of 16 attend as two couples were absent due to vacations and sickness. The meal consisted of brisket and chicken cordon bleu, which was ordered from an official caterer. We weren’t interested in repeating the previous year’s issues that made our meal an hour late. (See that post for the details on how someone’s dishonesty caused our delay. Shame on you Jason C.!) Getting all the foods in our bellies wasn’t entirely impediment-free though. The caterer forgot our cheesecakes, and we had to have a friend pick up substitution cookies on her way. However, since cookies also contain a high quantity of sugar, that was only a minor inconvenience.
Juvenile pictures are a standard at our seasonal shindig.
We usually play Just Dance at this shindig but not this time. Jason insisted it was a no-go because I couldn’t participate. My foot was just barely free from a two-month, boot-enforced hiatus resulting from a fractured talus, and dancing was still on my list of forbidden activities. As fate would have it, there wouldn’t have been any time for grooving anyway. We finished the white elephant exchange at 10:20 and had to hurry and clean up so we could be out of the facility by its 11:00 closing. Note to self, exchanging white elephants takes between 1.25 and 1.5 hours… those pale beasts sure are needy.
We ladies aren’t immune to the puerile.
That’s my shortest post in a long time. Though it does not necessarily follow that it’s also the sweetest. Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good fall!
Moab has long been one of our favorite places to hike and bike. What if hiking and biking weren’t an option? Would it still be a favorite? Read below, and you will know.
Before I can tell our story of visiting Moab last November, I need to go further back in time to when I found out my talus bone was fractured on my right ankle, and I had an associated bone lesion. By the way, this fracture happened six months before I became aware of it. (Why yes, I do have an exceptionally high pain tolerance. Why do you ask?). I had been wearing a walking boot for six weeks prior to our Moab excursion due to that discovery. My doctor originally told me I’d likely be able to ditch the boot after a month, but I was still in pain at that point, so the boot remained.
When we first learned that I’d still be dealing with ankle limitations in Moab, we almost canceled our trip. Wouldn’t it be sad to be there and not participate in our usual activities? Eventually, we concluded being in Moab is never sad though we’d have to be creative about ways to occupy ourselves. Luckily, our trip happened to fall right when my doctor said I could try taking the boot off again for a couple days and ascertain pain levels, though I was not supposed to do anything but normal walking during that interval. We decided a short, easy hike would be close enough to “normal walking” to be acceptable, and that’s how we ended up on the Pinyon Interpretive Loop.
The Pinyon Interpretive Loop only gains 68 feet making it a perfect trail for the recently bootless to test their calf prowess.
The Pinyon Interpretive Loop, just one mile, tells of the desert’s creative and symbiotic survivors including the pinyon jay, the pinyon mouse, biological soil crust (cryptobiotic soil)… and me. Okay, maybe there wasn’t a sign about me, but that day I felt like there should be. We took this trail unhurriedly for my ankle as it was my first nonessential walking in over six weeks and my first time without a boot for that long as well. It was an absolute delight! Forty-two degrees felt warmer than expected between the radiating rock, sunny skies, and lack of wind. Frankly, I would have found a blizzard acceptable.
Later that day, we investigated some history and rocks by visiting the Yellow Cat Mining District just north of Arches and searching for agate and jasper nearby. Online, we’d read accounts of the road to Yellow Cat being rough. It is not. I’m sure if you jumped on one of the route’s many offshoots you would be in for a rougher ride. However, the main path is appropriate for almost any vehicle.
In 2002, 171 openings in the Yellow Cat Mining District were closed as part of the Abandoned Mine Reclamation Program while the historical appearance of these portals was largely retained.
The extraction of radioactive ores (uranium and vanadium) at the Yellow Cat Mining District began in the early 1900s and ceased in the mid-1960s. The area was placed in the Grand County Register of Historic Places in 1998 due to its significance. While we didn’t have enough daylight to fully explore all the mines’ leftover structures, machineries, and crevices, we checked out a two-story building, the hillsides’ many adit openings, and the remnants of some ancient vehicles. We noticed many vent pipes dotting the landscape, a testament to just how far and plentiful the network of tunnels extended in the region.
Of the district’s many mine sites, 27 of those at Yellow Cat were eligible for nomination on the National Register of Historic Places.
When daylight began to dim, we commenced rockhounding operations without further delay. As we are not serious enough rockhounds to be particularly picky about specimens, we found some agate and jasper we were thrilled over with about half an hour of searching.
The next day, the high was just 41 degrees, yet we were undeterred. We did a mild, self-guided walking tour around the historic center of town as a compromise for my ankle, which was about 0.75 miles. On that we made thirteen stops to view structures like Star Hall, which was built in 1906 and is on the National Register of Historic Places, the Neals Olson Home, and the Old Courthouse and Jail Building. Most of these were constructed between the mid-1880s and the first decade of the 1900s, with a few newer outliers. The stroll was a fantastic way to slow down and appreciate noteworthy structures we may not have fully noticed before.
Hurrah Pass separates Kane Creek Canyon from the Colorado River Canyon at an elevation of 4,780 feet.
Since my feet couldn’t take me far, later that day we relied on a vehicle. We did the T-Rex 4×4 U-Drive Experience to Hurrah Pass tour. With an elevation of 4,780 feet, Hurrah Pass divides the Colorado River from Kane Springs Canyon. As the name of this tour suggests, we got to drive. Well, Jason got to drive as I didn’t want to with a weak peddle foot.
To get to Hurrah Pass, you take Kane Springs Road until it becomes Hurrah Pass Road. Then, you head up through the Moenkopi Formation, followed by Navajo Sandstone, and finally the Wingate Formation to the pass’ apex. The whole trip from Moab is around 30 miles, but the last section starting at Hurrah Pass Road is the only tricky bit. That concluding part is not terribly technical. However, it rides along cliffs with the base of Kane Springs Canyon hundreds of feet below, so a problem with heights is the main problem. I just had to advert my eyes. We had done some of this route before, but we were in new territory beyond Hunter Canyon.
From Hurrah Pass, potash evaporation ponds, Canyonlands National Park, Dead Horse Point State Park, and Kane Creek Canyon all surround you. It isn’t as scenic as some places around Moab but still impressive.
The central blockhouse bunker at the Athena Launch Complex was constructed of concrete and buried in a hillside.These may look like some sort of crazy conveyor belt system, but they were above-ground conduit boxes that connected each launch pad to the control center.
On our way home the next day, we made two stops of discovery. The first was the Athena Launch Complex that was part of the Utah Launch Complex near Green River (also called the Green River Test Site). This Cold War-era compound became active in 1962 as part of the Air Force’s program to test its Advanced Ballistic Re-entry System (ABRES). It was used by the Air Force until 1973. During that time, 141 Athena missiles were fired. The Army also used the site starting in 1971 to test their nuclear-capable Pershing missile. Their operations halted in 1975 after the launch of 61 missiles. After employing hundreds of Green River residents for nearly two decades, the complex was decommissioned in 1979. We learned this information following our visit. Hence, we knew little about what the site was used for or what we would find as we explored it. Would you like to know what you can find? Then, read on.
Anything of value, like copper wiring, was plundered from the Green River Test Site decades ago.The site contains tunnels that go straight into the ground. These are housed in metal and accessed with ladders. They once served as junction domes.
You can freely wander this site’s three launch pads and other assorted structures. The high fences and bright lights that once deterred the unwanted are now warped and broken. We spent hours examining the equipment and buildings trying to figure out what we were looking at. It definitely satiated our curiosity craving!
The inside of the central blockhouse bunker, while a mess, still holds tidbits of interest.
The repetition of the site’s three launch pads allowed us to gradually piece together purpose and design. Portions missing on one endured on others. The TCEE tracks were gone on Pad 3, the first one we encountered. We thought we might be looking at a helicopter pad, but the grooves that seemed like they once held some sort of rail line confused me. Pad 2, our second pad, still had its rails. So, I realized I was right about there once being tracks. Pad 1, the most intact pad, was the last one we visited. After we had puzzled over and imagined how things worked on the other two, it was gratifying to see a much more complete TCEE (Temperature Controlled Environmental Enclosures) system.
Pad 3 launched 49 missiles. More of its infrastructure is missing than the others.Pad 2 had 41 launches. Sections of its gantry still remain.
Other mysteries didn’t entirely get solved until following our outing. The first pad we inspected had a building nearby with only one wall standing. We thought the other three might have just fallen down until we came across another of the same type of structure at the next pad. But why buildings with only one wall? They appeared to have HVAC components in them. We were puzzled. It was only after some online research that we ascertained ultra-high quality (UHQ) blast shields were used to protect cooling ducts at each launch pad. That’s why those edifices only had walls on one side; they were blast shields. Duh!
Each launch pad had its own blast shield. The purpose of these one-walled oddities mystified us at first.Each pad included a concrete ring. These vaults served as part of the gantry platform and allowed for venting.
The gantry equipment used as scaffolding around the missiles, some of which was lying around Pad 2, also perplexed us. We had no idea what it was and thought it might have slid on the tracks running along the concrete, but it seemed too long to do so. This was another enigma internet information elucidated. Historical puzzles are a blast!
Missiles were loaded onto the launch pads from buildings on rails called Temperature Controlled Environment Enclosures or TCEE. These were rolled away before launch.
After that enthralling afternoon, we visited the Prehistoric Museum in Price. We’d passed this museum countless times going to Moab. It had always intrigued us, but we had never taken the time to stop. We arrived there one hour and 20 minutes before closing. While we were told the average person spends 45 minutes to an hour at the museum, I am not the average museum guest. I didn’t even make it through one of its two wings, but we did hurry through most of the Horns and Tusks section, the museum’s current temporary exhibit, shortly before closing. It covered the outlandish and whacky evolution of frills, tusks, antlers, horns, and other headgear. Cool!
Nearly 50 years of desert exposure has given every surface of the only remaining TCEE a thick and crusty layer of muck.
I loved that this museum focuses on Utah from the beginnings of the Earth and includes many rock and fossil specimens specifically from the state. Jason and I will certainly be heading back to check out what we missed.
The verdict on Moab sans hiking and biking? A broken foot can halt certain activities, but it can’t halt adventure. Our Moab trip was atypical in pastimes but typical in that we had an amazing stay.
Decorating for our Halloween party is always a major task. In 2022, it was more than that; it was a love note to one of our favorite shows: Stranger Things.
For this theme, our favorite to date, we took on quite a few large and unusual projects that required construction, programming, painting, coloring, and even gardening skills. Let’s talk about a few of those projects.
If you don’t know the referenced scene, you aren’t a fan of Stranger Things.
We attempted to recreate the tunnel maps from season two of the series. While our exuberance did not go so far as to replicate the thousands of sheets used in the filming of the show, we did color 186 pieces of paper. I scribbled 36, Jason colored 63, and our niece completed 87. For this endeavor, we bought a box of 800 crayons. The scheme ended up not requiring as many Crayolas as anticipated. Anyone in need of 750+ crayons?
Jason harnessed his inner Will and scribbled like a shirtless boy possessed.
Jason decided to build a portal complete with escaping vines. I thought this undertaking had a high likelihood of turning out less than spectacular due to its complex nature. I was happy to be wrong. We didn’t stop cultivating vines there though. Utilizing some kind helpers, we fashioned dozens more of them for our Upside Down backyard employing foam pipe insulation, pliable wires, and black duct tape. These also turned out better than expected. By the way, if you find online tutorials for making these vines that include instructions for coating them in a layer of latex, don’t bother. We tried that, and the latex didn’t add much except stickiness, so it wasn’t worth the bother.
Good thing Jason took woodshop classes back in high school; portal construction is a necessary life skill after all.
Another project that proved time consuming was a strand of lights Jason and a helper programmed in Arduino to flash 20 different phrases from the Upside Down in connection to a vinyl alphabet displayed on the wall. Such a setup can provide hours of diversion, just ask the Byers family.
Our tunnel maps confused or delighted guests depending on their familiarity with Stranger Things.
We also transformed our garage into the Snowball Dance. Like any self-respecting 80s, middle-school dance, it had cheesy streamers, a disco ball, a balloon arch, strings of lights, and plenty of metallic fringe. Awkward tweens were the only thing missing… plenty of those came later.
The nostalgia and neon were thick at our event.
In addition to our big projects, we made sure Easter eggs were stashed throughout the event space. These included a Lite Brite with “Run” twinkling on it, a boombox playing “Running Up That Hill”, “Papa” pictures, Have You Seen Me? posters, the rainbow art on Eleven’s door, slimy blue slugs, and crayoned drawings of the Mind Flayer.
Jason patiently knotted all the jute for Dusty’s ghillie suit.
Since our decorating tasks were extensive, I was thrilled I didn’t have to sew costumes at least. However, our getups did require a lot of jute knotting and hot gluing, which required a lot of sacrificial hand burning. I glued both ends of over 100 nails and painted gore on them. These were attached to trashcan lids for Eddie and Dusty. My fingers weren’t the only digit casualties during our preparations. Jason also fell and jammed his finger horribly while carting decorations up the stairs.
We look like just buddies, right?
Other extremities were bigger problem makers. My ankle was broken, and therefore I was wearing the mandatory boot for such an injury during all of this. That boot made party preparations exponentially more tiring and uncomfortable. I was on my feet for 18 hours one day and nearly that long the next. Have you ever tried to stay on your feet for 18 hours while you are wearing a massive boot and have a fractured ankle? I wouldn’t recommend it. Plus, the boot made navigating the many boxes and decorations littered about our house much more hazardous. The stairs were particularly perilous. I nearly toppled many times, and going up and down them while holding all that stuff? Even worse. It’s surprising Jason was the only one who tumbled.
We were completely committed to our tunnel map motif.
Fortunately, we had kind volunteers assisting us and our extremities. One friend came to help many days after work. Another shared her artistic talents by painting vines while her husband labored on our programming problems. A brother-in-law and multiple nieces and nephews helped create fringe and tunnel drawings and took on full ownership of a section of our portal tunnel. Our niece said decorating for our party was as fun as coming to our party.
Wavy streamers and lights provided the correct amount of ceiling tackiness for our Snowball Dance.
After all that, how did the event go? We were still scrambling until right before it started. It turns out making portals and vines and talking lights and 80s dance scenes takes up a lot of time. Luckily, our costumes did not require much effort to put on, or we would have been very late to our own shindig.
I’m never gonna give you up. Also, I am your father. Anyone want to go to Camp Crystal Lake?
We had about 72 guests that evening, which was manageable but almost too many. Party happenings included three 40-minute D&D campaigns led by a veteran Dungeon Master, carnival games, bingo, an outdoor screening of The NeverEnding Story, an opportunity to vote for Steve or Eddie, a contest for deciphering messages from the Upside Down via Joyce’s lights, a selfie spot, and a photo booth with a professional photographer. Food came in the form of corndogs and fries from the Corndog Commander, cupcakes and cookies from Alisha’s, and waffles from Eleven’s Eggo Buffet. The buffet featured a toaster, chocolate chips, marshmallows, fruit, whipped cream, Biscoff Cookie Butter, and Mrs. Butterworth’s syrup, along with the required Eggos of course.
We always have a heap of costume contest prizes at our party.
This year, for the first time since 2020, we opened up the main floor of our house for the party. The mix of inside and outside space seemed appreciated though external temperatures were warmer than the previous all-outside year.
Jason made a fantastic Eddie, but he didn’t know how to hold his guitar.
I put together 68 party favors encompassing a selection of options. For starters, I compiled two dozen bags for the younger kids filled with a gnarly assortment of 80s goodies. Back-to-school sets with Trapper Keepers and 4-Color pen combos were another alternative as were Stranger Things coloring books paired with themed color pencils. (Friends Don’t Lilac and Frozen Waffles are always in vogue hues.) Rubiks cubes and banana clips, 80s standards, were the stars of yet other favors, and Dungeons & Dragons starter kits provided an additional possibility. Finally, I built nearly 30 character-themed bags focused on either Max, Eddie, Steve, or Eleven. These bags contained items like bracelets made from recycled skateboards, waffle shaped bath balms, 80s metal band pins, and replicas of Eddie’s guitar pick necklace. After the event, we had 13 favors left, six child and seven adult ones, only because some people apparently have an aversion to neon.
Our portal turned out far better than I expected.
Although the party required an incredible amount of work, we enjoyed sharing our love of Stranger Things with other appreciative fans. That extended beyond the confines of our shindig. On Halloween, we set up our portal and gave candy away in our backyard. We went through 198 candy bars, and the portal was a hit. Kids returned with their parents and texted their friends to come too. Eddie was a rock star and greeted warmly by many.
Stranger details were scattered throughout our house and yard.
Many thanks to our totally tubular aides who helped turn our world upside down last fall and our radical party guests who helped turn it right side up.
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