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Valentine’s Day the Rachel Way

Every year I complain about complaining. Yup, you know the drill. I can’t handle the incessant Valentine’s Day whining that is so ubiquitous during February. For crying out loud people! Is doing something special for your special someone really that much of a burden? If they aren’t worth a little effort then one would have to wonder about the accuracy of their “special” title.

Valentine’s Day, that abhorred and adored holiday, just hit again and once more I heard lots of griping over it. For instance, one of my coworkers was grumbling about how Valentine’s Day is the stupidest of holidays because he has to buy his wife flowers. Since, out of all the February moaners, those that object to doing something nice for their spouse annoy me the most, I will focus the venom of this preachy post on that sorry group.

Jason got me such a huge bouquet of flowers I had to rearrange my desk to find a space for it.
Jason got me such a huge bouquet of flowers I had to rearrange my desk to find a space for it.

In contrast to the pathetically unromantic mentioned above, I love Valentine’s Day. It means I GET to do something thoughtful for the man that I adore. It provides an excuse for me to remind Jason, AKA the best husband in the world, that he is my favorite person. I would never waste this occasion with whining and neither would my fine hubby.

This year it was Jason’s turn to plan our Valentine’s Day activities and he wisely chose to get us tickets to Cinderella the ballet. (Yes, you men can go to the ballet with little risk that images of leotards will be permanently burned into your retinas.) We had a great time laughing at the clumsy stepsisters and admiring the grace of the other dancers. A couple of days later, Jason surprised me with another round of Valentine’s fun: a Mexican flavors cooking class up at Sur La Table. I’ve got one smart man. I love to cook and Jason’s culinary skills could use some improving so this tutorial was an excellent idea. Jason’s motives for signing us up for this course may not have been entirely selfless though. I’m sure he realized that this class would increase his chances of getting yummy Mexican food in the future. Whatever his reasons, we thoroughly enjoyed preparing and chowing our flavorful dinner of pork-and-cheese arepas, pork and beef-stuffed poblanos, chipotle-rubbed salmon tacos, and Mexican chocolate pots de crème. Tasty! Obtaining culinary masterfulness obviously requires a lot of eating; I’m willing to make the sacrifice.

Jason and I had to put some effort into eating all of this fruit arrangement before it spoiled but our hard work paid off. Not a single strawberry went bad
Jason and I had to put some serious effort into eating all of this fruit arrangement before it spoiled but our hard work paid off. Not a single strawberry went bad.

Even though it wasn’t my turn to head up our celebrations this year, I still plotted plenty. I sneakily planned a series of treats for Jason. First, I took some fancy donuts and hot chocolate to his office for him to share with his coworkers. Next, on another day, I took some balloons and handmade chocolates to his office for him not to share with his coworkers. And then, on Valentine’s Day, I showered him with a whole slew of presents that I had fastidiously wrapped.

Jason too wasn’t content with just going the extra mile on Valentine’s Day…he wanted to go the extra hundred. He brought a gorgeous bouquet of flowers to me while I was at work and then, a couple of hours later when I suspected nothing, he had another bouquet delivered. This second bouquet was made of delicious fruit and chocolate covered strawberries. I have to say that I got a twinge of warped delight from the shocked look on my coworker’s face, the one that had been complaining about having to give his wife flowers on Valentine’s Day, when he walked by my desk and saw everything Jason had sent me. That’s right dude, there are plenty of fabulous husbands out there that, unlike you, aren’t content with a mediocre marriage and I’m wedded to one of them.

The poblano peppers we stuffed in our cooking class were mighty tasty.
The poblano peppers we stuffed in our cooking class were mighty tasty.

I have the happiest marriage imaginable because both Jason and I see occasions like Valentine’s Day as opportunities not inconveniences. There’s more than just a correlation between our outlook on matters like this and our atypical bliss. I know that some of you, even after my poignant words of wisdom, are still thinking that Valentine’s Day just isn’t for you. For that group, here are a couple of the most common excuses I’ve heard for ignoring Valentine’s Day and the reasons I think that they’re invalid, especially for the permanently committed:

Excuse 1: Doing something nice for my significant other on Valentine’s Day is too expensive.

While I tend to bestow my hubby with a few too many gifts, such is my way, one can show someone how much they love them through many other means: cleaning out their car, making them a yummy dinner, serving them breakfast in bed, selflessly volunteering to take care of the kids while they have a guilt-free day out with their friends, giving them a relaxing foot massage, baking them cookies, writing them a thoughtful love note, cleaning the house, watching their favorite chick flick with them without complaint, surprising them at work with a lunch for two…like the Energizer Bunny I could just keep going and going. The point is that financial limitations are no excuse for not celebrating Valentine’s Day.

I always make sure Jason's Valentine's Day gifts are wrapped extravagantly.
I always make sure Jason’s Valentine’s Day gifts are wrapped extravagantly.

Excuse 2: I don’t like the expectations of this holiday and would rather surprise my significant other on some random day when it will actually be a surprise.

While I get this, I’ve found that those that don’t do anything special for their spouses on Valentine’s Day are usually the same people that are thoughtless the rest of the year and the least likely candidates for ever surprising their partners out of the blue. Putting effort into a relationship is a habit and a refusal to do something considerate for your significant other when given the chance, even if it’s expected, is typically indicative of a trend of marital laziness. I enjoy surprising my husband often and am known for bringing treats unpredictably to his work. (I’m quite popular with his coworkers.) But I still delight in concocting Jason-related Valentine’s Day schemes, even if he expects such shenanigans. After all, he should expect to be shown how much I adore him constantly. If he ever ceases to expect that then I have failed him as a wife.

Jason and I are supremely content with our life together and we have a blast celebrating Valentine’s Day. If you can’t say the same then perhaps you should consider putting forth a little more effort. Any physicist can tell you that you have to put energy into a system to get energy out of it. If you aren’t putting any energy into your relationship, why should you expect to get anything worthwhile out of it? Do I say this with smugness? Absolutely. I’m not exactly known for holding back my opinions on any subject but, considering the strength of my marriage, I think I’m in a pretty good position to give advice on this particular topic. So go forth and celebrate Valentine’s Day and think twice before you come crying to me about having to remember your valentine. Frankly, you’d fare better just buying those flowers without comment.

Rachel February 27, 2013 2 Comments

The Regency Ball

It’s no secret that I’m an Austenphile. After all, it is a truth universally acknowledged that any woman of good taste must be in want of a Mr. Darcy…and if Mr. Darcy isn’t available then a well-dressed replicate will do.

My hairdresser Stacy created my do for this event. She did a great job; I got lots of compliments.
My hairdresser Stacy created my do for this event. She did a great job; I got lots of compliments.

When I heard that the Jane Austen Society of Utah was holding a Regency Ball and a group of our friends was interested in going, I was instantly on board. Unfortunately, because I only learned of this event two weeks beforehand, I had to sort out our costumes in a hurry. Thankfully, since Jason and I dressed as Mr. Darcy and Elizabeth Bennet for Halloween a couple of years ago, I had already made most of what we needed but some quick stitching was still necessary. I had run out of time that Halloween and, consequently, hadn’t gotten around to making the authentic (circa 1790-1830) shirt that I had planned on sewing for Jason. He had had to manage with an obscured pirate blouse. And his waistcoat, another actual pattern from the late 1700s, had turned out undersized even though I had added 3 or 4 inches to its length. (Those Georgian gentlemen must have been puny things like me.) Since I wanted Jason to look perfect for the Regency Ball, I was determined to get that historically accurate shirt done and a new longer waistcoat made for him. Also, being a woman, I felt compelled to accessorize my costume a bit and an Austen style purse, known as a reticule, which could hold all of my girly stuff during the party, was just the thing so I added one of those to my sew list.

The men had snobbish disdain down pretty well. Practice does make perfect.
The men had snobbish disdain down pretty well. Practice does make perfect.

Two weeks isn’t much time to sew a shirt, vest, and purse but it’s doable. Then again, these weren’t your run-of-the-mill clothing items. Because I was using actual 1700s patterns, the instructions were horrendously hard to decipher and follow. Plus, the designs for these articles incorporated a whole lot of extra pieces that didn’t seem to serve any purpose. I ended up completely disregarding the instructions for the waistcoat and just doing my own thing. The shirt’s directions weren’t as awful so I did use them for the most part, even though they called for an absurd number of gussets to be stitched into peculiar places. (Before this experience I didn’t even know what a gusset was.) I also had to make my Princess Peach outfit for our polar plunge in the middle of all of this. (Insert curse word of choice here.) Talk about sewing to near insanity! Everything turned out splendidly though so I have no lasting complaints. Oddly, Jason’s unembellished shirt, with its simple details, was my favorite out of everything I created. Those gussets and strange pieces combined to make something that could have come straight out of Pride and Prejudice.

Jason and I make a pretty great pair. Maybe that's why we nearly won best couple.
Jason and I make a pretty great pair. Maybe that’s why we nearly won the prize for best couple.

And the ball? Fantastic! Most of our night was spent dancing with only a short intermission for dinner. I love moving my feet so I didn’t grow weary of skipping, spinning, and galloping even after four hours. The meticulous costumes and ubiquitous curtseying successfully made me feel like I had been transported to a time long-gone when a bow to honor your partner was customary before a tune began. We were taught many dances from the Regency Period but we moved through them quite quickly so I’m not entirely sure how much of that footwork my tootsies retained. However, I definitely remember the steps to my favorite dance, the reel, which involve a whole lot of whirling and dosadoing. I’m a twirly kind of girly!

Our group looked spiffy in their mostly homemade attire.
Our group looked spiffy in their mostly homemade attire.

All the members of our group put substantial effort into their attire. Amber made terrific costumes for her and Jeremy. Simone and Abigail bravely sewed their dresses but decided to send their husbands to the costumer’s. And Jason and I looked pretty bona fide adorned in our useless gussets. The work I put into our clothes did not go unnoticed. We were runners-up for best couple out of the roughly 200 people present. It made me feel a little better about all that manic stitching.

Jason's shirt looked like something straight out of Pride and Prejudice.
Jason’s shirt looked like something straight out of Pride and Prejudice.

It was a perfect evening filled with frills and twirls. My feet were throbbing by the end of the night but I enjoyed every minute of the ball regardless. It provided an excellent excuse to get dolled up and then get down. The setting may not have been as plush as the halls of Pemberley but I felt immersed in that classic grandeur all the same. Plus, my late model Mr. Darcy was definitely handsome enough to tempt me. I hope we can attend this event again next year. You might want to consider joining us. After all, any savage can dance.

Rachel February 20, 2013 No Comments

The Steps to Sundance

The Sundance Film Festival just ended. As usual, Jason and I eagerly added our bodies to the masses of movie aficionados during its 10 day stint. We’ve been attending this world-famous at hand event for almost a decade and we always look forward to its star-strewn madness.

Our enjoyment of Sundance has improved in recent years by going the locals route. Yes, if you’re a Utah resident you can get tickets to the Sundance Film Festival before the general public. How does a native do this one might ask? First, you have to remember to register in October. If you forget to sign up then you’ve lost your chance at passes. Second, you have to wait for your appointed timeslot to purchase your ticket package, not individual tickets mind you but just your ticket package of choice. The chance to buy a package works like a lottery. So far fate has smiled on us and we haven’t been denied this acquisition but there’s a first time for everything. Next, about a month after buying your package, your timeslot for picking individual tickets is revealed. This window is based on another system of chance, you might get lucky and be in the first group to get tickets or less fortunate and be in the last. Either way you can’t complain because, no matter what, you’re choosing your seats before the crowds get a chance. When your ticket opening hits you’d better be fast. Identifying what you want beforehand and having a strategy is paramount or you will be left in others’ box office dust. You never know what will be sold out so you have to be flexible and have lots of backup plans. Jason and I usually draw up a complex ticketing diagram beforehand to aid us in this part. Finally, a couple weeks later, you get to pick up your tickets but only during a designated timeslot. (You getting a feel for how many timeslots are involved in this process?) This must be done at the Salt Lake City Sundance box office with a Utah driver’s license in hand and there is often a wait. This year Jason ended up standing in line for about an hour. But at least at the end of this queue you are, at last, the gratified holder of passes to some exclusive events. Hallelujah! Yes, the locals method is a complicated procedure but it makes getting into popular screenings possible for us nobodies and the nobodies we know. Jason and I are nice; we buy an extra-large ticket package every year so that we have some passes to spread to our friends. Hint to friends: if you want us to continue purchasing tickets for you in the future be grateful that we let you benefit from our toil.

We attended a couple screenings with Drew and Simone. It's always fun to have some company.
We attended a couple screenings with Drew and Simone. It’s always fun to have some company.

All that ticket commotion happens before Sundance starts. What happens after it begins is also crazy but much more enjoyable. Here’s what transpired for us after the festival commenced this year:

The Crash Reel was the first show we attended and what a way to kick things off. It was a documentary that followed the fall and rise of snowboarder Kevin Pearce. You may recall that Kevin Pearce was an Olympic favorite in the half-pipe for the Vancouver Olympics. He had beaten Shaun White on multiple occasions so it was anyone’s guess who would come away with the gold. Unfortunately, about 2 months before the Olympics Kevin Pearce wrecked while training in Park City and suffered a traumatic brain injury. With a damaged noggin, Kevin’s continuance of competitive snowboarding was unacceptably risky to the loved ones of this talented rider but he found the overwhelming danger harder to acknowledge. Being a snowboarder myself, with injuries that have made riding the slopes impossible at times, I think I can understand to a small degree the devastation that Kevin felt when he realized he’d have to give up boarding.

A whole lot of famous boarders showed up to support The Crash Reel.
A whole lot of famous boarders showed up to support The Crash Reel. It was marvelous!

This was a fantastic film that had elements of a cool boarding movie along with touching inspirational moments. It’s supposed to premier on HBO during the summer and I would highly recommend checking it out. As an extra treat we got to meet not only Kevin but Scotty Lago, the American that received the half-pipe bronze medal in Vancouver, and a whole bunch of other amazing snowboarders like Mason Aguirre, Luke Mitrani, Jack Mitrani, and Danny Davis. Lucy Walker, the academy award nominated director, was also present. Wow!

The Summit was a documentary that shed some light on the tragic events that occurred near the peak of K2 in August of 2008. K2, the second highest peak in the world at 28,251 feet, is far more dangerous to climb than Everest. Did you know that 1 in 4 mountaineers that make it to the top of K2 die during their descent? That dwarfs Everest’s 5% and is hard to wrap your mind around. Any hike up K2 is apparently a gamble with death but during this particular disaster, the worst in K2 history, 11 of the 24 climbers that attempted to reach the summit never made it back to camp. As you can imagine, this documentary was intense and disconcerting. It was hard to understand why these climbers would risk so much for an unnecessary achievement. One of the saviors of the catastrophe, a Sherpa named Pemba Gyalje, surprisingly showed up for the Q&A after the show and got a standing ovation. It was a pleasure to be in the presence of this heroic and humble man.

Pemba Gyalje's unexpected appearance at The Summit's Q&A had everyone on their feet.
Pemba Gyalje’s unexpected appearance at The Summit‘s Q&A had everyone on their feet.

These first two documentaries really made an impact on me. More than a week later my dreams were still invaded by troubling rides on powder or unsettling climbs up insurmountable mountains. Even now I find myself daydreaming about the images, characters, and music from these films that moved me. I believe movies like these, great movies, linger with you and continue to change your perception of the world long after the credits have rolled.

Computer Chess was an unusual flick that imagined the inner goings of the world of computer programmers in the early 80s, specifically programmers that were trying to teach machines how to play chess. It was quite nerdy and, like many indie films, a bit slow but I enjoyed its randomness and appreciated its geeky humor.

Andrew Bujalski, the director of Computer Chess, was enthusiastic about his creative homage to nerdery.
Andrew Bujalski, the director of Computer Chess, was enthusiastic about his creative homage to nerdery.

We Steal Secrets: the Story of WikiLeaks was an insightful and interesting documentary. It portrayed Julian Assange pretty fairly but not favorably. The WikiLeaks organization, on the other hand, it presented as more idealistic and less hypocritical.

The last picture we saw was The Inevitable Defeat of Mister and Pete. This film followed the lives of two project kids as they tried to survive a summer without their junkie parents. While it was told from the perspective of the kids, it was not meant for a young audience; these children faced obstacles that no kid should have to. Yet, it was somehow endearing and sweet while maintaining its harsh reality.

It was another great year for us at the festival. We saw a variety of flicks that made us giggle, gasp, and grieve. Attending Sundance may take work but it’s nothing compared to what goes into putting this festival on. We met the program director for Sundance at one of our screenings and learned that 12,000 film submissions, about 1,500 of which are documentaries, get sent in every year. They all have to be watched in order for the best hundred or so to be selected. Holy movie overload Batman! I’m not sure how you could view that many every year and come away still enjoying films; I’d never want to see another movie in my life. Good thing I get to watch 11,995 less than those programmers. We’ve found that catching 5 Sundance films each year is just about right for us. It’s enough to get the flavor of the festival without getting burnout. See you in 2014 Sundance!

Rachel January 30, 2013 No Comments
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