Total Eclipse

Vampires, werewolves, and screaming 40 year old women… oh my!

Jason and I went to the Twifest, an Eclipse premier party put on by a local theater chain, last week with my friend Wendy. It had all the fixins of a good time:

Vendor booths where you can blow lots of money on frivolous cutesy stuff and cheesy Twilight merchandise? Check

Lots of crazy fans running around wearing red contacts and black capes like the loopy leftovers of some Halloween gone bad? Check

Tasty drinks named after tasty men? Check

The good company of my own hot man? Check

Lanyards accessorized with an abundance of Twilight character pins? Check

A girly companion to giggle and scream with? Check

This sidewalk chalk art looked pretty cool.
This sidewalk art looked pretty cool...and I looked pretty idiotic groping it.

And did the movie satisfy?

Lots of feelings and talking about feelings? Check

Buff men who run around shirtless even in the middle of blizzards? Check

Sparkles? Check

The ever classic werewolf-vampire-human love triangle? Check

Wendy and I were happy to play the part of the half-crazed Twilight fans
Wendy and I were happy to play the part of half-crazed Twilight fans for the camera. Yeah, we were only acting. Uh Huh.

I liked the movie even though it had a few problems. The special effects were only so-so; considering the amount of money that baby is sure to bring in they could have done much better. And the pacing was completely off during the scene at the end where Jacob gets hurt; it felt rushed and unrealistic. Yeah, I know this is a movie about a bunch of werewolves and vampires so realism isn’t exactly paramount but still… also, if you pay attention you’ll notice Jacob phases back into a human with his shorts on in that scene. How is that supposed to work, eh???

Despite my grievances I enjoyed the flick and had a lot of fun being among the flock of fanatical twerds.

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