Wally, Pong, and Chow

Posted by on December 17, 2011 at 12:40 pm :: 1 Comment

What says Christmas better than a hideous moustache and a sweater even your mom wouldn’t be caught dead in? The answer perhaps is a Sabin fest that incorporates not only both of these foul abominations but also some seasonal classics, white elephant gifts and overeating, along with a couple nontraditional holiday pastimes, ping pong and wallyball. The result of this unusual combination? A party of such repugnant, yet satisfying, proportions that a word more disgusting than disgusting would have to be added to the dictionary to adequately portray its disgustingness.

The food for our party was catered from Zupas and Kneaders: creamy soups, fresh rolls, gooey brownies, chocolate dipped strawberries, and giant gingerbread men. I don't think anyone left hungry.

No comment.

Although last year’s moustache and unsightly sweater party was a cringe fest, our friends, it turns out, liked that repulsive theme so this year we brought tacky back like a barfing kid on a merry-go-round.

Can you figure out what is going on in this picture? If so, you must be a photograph deciphering savant.

The girls packed together for a picture of their own. I must say, we are much more photogenic than those silly boys.

For this event Jason and I rented a suite of rooms at Noah’s that included a wallyball court, ping pong arena, and chow station. We, along with our collected friends, played ping pong until we were dizzy and then wallyball until our forearms burned. If we ever began feeling even slightly exercised we recommenced eating so our belt straps were the only things overly exerted. And once we had consumed our weight in cookies and grown tired of tossing balls we fought over the prettiest awful white elephant gifts ever.

Jacob overheated playing wallyball even with half of his belly hanging beyond the confines of his undersized sweater. So, like a little boy, he just removed that offending article of clothing and ran around in various stages of toplessness. He wore Jason's itchy vest briefly before deciding he preferred no shirt at all.

Maybe baby Jesus didn’t anticipate ugly attire and gluttony heralding in the arrival of his birthday every year but hey, what a birthday party! Here’s to the nauseating traditions that make Christmas so dang memorable!

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