Our friend, Jeremy Rowley, recently fulfilled a lifetime fantasy of his: he bought a motor boat. I think he envisioned achieving this dream a little sooner in life but, as the saying goes, better boat now than never.
He invited me, Jason, and our friend Jacob, to join him and his family on the maiden voyage of his illustrious watercraft.
We took the boat out on Utah Lake and had a lovely time wakeboarding, kneeboarding, and slalom waterskiing. Well, I should qualify that statement by saying that I kneeboarded, Jeremy waterskied and wakeboarded, Jason wakeboarded, and Jacob drank a lot of nasty lake water as he was dragged through the wake while he attempted unsuccessfully to kneeboard and wakeboard.
Milo, the Rowley’s little boy, had no problems kneeboarding even though it was his first time trying too. Sorry Jacob, I guess you were out done by a 7 year old. Oh burn! Speaking of burns, Jeremy and Jacob failed to apply adequate amounts of sunscreen and they both got bad sunburns. Oh, double burn! (Yup that’s right; my insult works both metaphorically and literally. I am so dang clever!)
We had a lot of fun out on the water and are glad that Jeremy got his dearest wish. Now that he has everything his heart desires what will his next lifelong ambition be? Getting a better boat? Reach for the stars Jeremy, reach for the stars!
Jason felt a little left out when I biked Goldilocks a few months ago since he was prohibited from participating in this ride because of his obvious lack of femaleness. I therefore decided to sign us up for a coed ride called the Tour de Riverton so his tired muscles could convince him that he never needed to feel like he was missing out on anything ever again.
The Tour de Riverton, a 25 mile ride, took place bright and early last Saturday. Although this event, like Goldilocks, was “noncompetitive” the presence of men had the obnoxious effect of making it a lot less laidback than Goldilocks. Sorry men, sometimes your competitive intensity is simply not cool.
Jason too had a hard time quelling his urge to beat out whatever guy happened to be pedaling next to him but I made it clear from the start that if he decided to turn this ride into a race he was on his own and I would just continue to mosey along at my own pace and enjoy the lovely morning. I guess my husband does love me because he wasn’t too tempted to leave me to meander the course by myself. He’d say he wasn’t tempted at all but I know better.
My critique? Although I got to spend nearly 3 hours biking with my sweet husband during the Tour de Riverton and I enjoyed it, I liked Goldilocks better. Goldilocks was so chill and relaxed. You could tell the participating women weren’t there just to bike; they were also there to hangout and socialize with one another. When men were added to the mix for the Tour de Riverton who was ahead of you seemed to become far more important than who you were riding with. What can I say men, sometimes you suck.
My father is in his 60’s but he definitely doesn’t have the mentality of the typical 60 year old. A few weeks ago he expressed interest in getting a longboard, which is basically a longer faster version of a skateboard that’s meant for speedy cruising rather than doing tricks. We were all a little surprised that my dad wanted a longboard but not too surprised. After all, he is into paragliding and long-distance running and he claims that he would get a tattoo and pierce his ears if he didn’t have to look presentable for clients.
My family collectively decided that a longboard would be a great Father’s Day gift for my Daddy-O. Since Jason used to be into skateboarding when he was a young fry he was nominated to pick out this present. This afforded me the chance to scheme up a subplot of my own. For years Jason has said he would love to try longboarding if only he had someone to go cruising with. Now that my dad would have a board, and thus Jason would have a boarding buddy, I decided that it was time to get Jason his long-desired longboard. So when we arrived at Milo, our favorite board store, ready to shop for my dad I informed Jason that in addition to picking out a board for my father he would be picking out one for himself. He was surprised but very excited about this plan. We spent an hour and a half perusing Milo’s boards and changed our minds over and over again about which ones we liked best. But eventually we came to a decision… mostly because the store was closing so we had no choice.
Despite how long it had taken Jason to choose a board for himself that night, by the next morning he already had plans to go back to Milo to exchange that board he had so laboriously selected. Yes, Jason’s decision making skills are on par with a politician’s. What I didn’t know was that Jason was not just vacillating, he was also scheming. He bought me an early birthday present when he went back to Milo to swap boards: a longboard of my own. He kept this board a secret for a few days until we were going to take his board out on its maiden voyage. That’s when he pulled my new board out of the dark recesses of his extremely chaotic closet. I was completely shocked! I’m pretty good at sniffing out Jason plots but I didn’t see this one coming.
Jason and I have already taken out boards out a few times; they are a blast! We especially enjoyed going longboarding with my dad on Father’s day. Since all the members of my family were in on the gift many of them brought their own wheeled contraptions to my parent’s house knowing that my dad would probably want to try his new board out. My brother brought his waveboard, my sister and her fiancé brought their skateboards, and my nephew Jadon even brought his scooter. Another nephew, Miles, didn’t bring a traveling device of his own but he was fascinated by the longboards. He was very eager to ride them and we had a hard time getting him to get off even when he scraped up his knee and elbow.
What a peculiar boarding gang we made! I’m sure we got some strange looks from the people walking by our odd group. It’s not every day you see a cluster of young kids riding scooters and scooting on boards alongside adults that look far too old for such hooligan activities.
I should warn the unsuspecting that the desire to longboard is like an insidious disease that spreads with shocking rapidity. My dad simply mentioned that he wanted a longboard and then all of a sudden Jason and I had one. And the boards continue to mysteriously mushroom among my family members; my sister’s fiancé John is now toying with the idea of getting one and I’m sure if Miles didn’t have a paranoid mother he would find some way to obtain one as well.
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