The Cycling Cycle

Although I’ve been mountain biking since I was a teenager, that activity has never teetered toward mundane. How could the exhilaration of aerobic accomplishment accompanied by the beauty of remote landscapes and a touch of danger ever get old? It’s a stupid question so don’t bother trying to answer it.

Sharp peaks topped with tenacious snow above fields of wild grasses gorged on spring's runoff: rides don't get prettier than this.
Sharp peaks topped with tenacious snow above fields of wild grasses gorged on spring’s runoff: rides don’t get prettier than this.
Adam didn't welcome the uphill portion of Big Springs Hollow but he did love zooming down.
Adam didn’t welcome the uphill portion of Big Springs Hollow but he did love zooming down.

Once the lingering bits of stubborn snow finally receded last spring, Jason and I went mountain biking as often as possible, too many times for each of our adventures to warrant its own fuss. Instead, all those experiences have been lumped together into this giant tribute to a summer of marvelous cycling.

You may not be able to see the little bumps on Abigail's arm in this tiny picture but they are there and they were the workings of a stinging nettle consortium.
You may not be able to see the little bumps on Abigail’s arm in this tiny picture but they are there and they were the workings of a stinging nettle consortium.
We are Lambert Park regulars.
We are Lambert Park regulars.

The first trail we hit this year, outside Moab of course, was Big Springs Hollow in Provo Canyon. This ride has a relentless uphill portion but the trip down, through lush meadows and pleasant woods, is completely worth that exertion. We took our friends Adam and Abigail with us on this inaugural occasion in hopes that it would convince them to continue their pursuit of pedaling and perhaps it would have had fate, and a bridge, not intervened. Abigail swerved around a corner too fast while descending the mountain and skidded off a rail-less bridge into a healthy bunch of stinging nettle growing brookside. This bridge was only a couple of feet from the ground but, since it was Abigail’s first mountain-biking tumble, she was pretty shaken by the affair and completely convinced that the plants she’d encountered were poison ivy. (They were not. If you doubt me, I have photographic proof and would be happy to share it because I am a pesky know-it-all.) Needless to say, Abigail has not expressed interest in riding with us since. For some, the dangers of mountain biking are all very well until they actually become dangerous. Maybe someday Abigail will forget that mountain biking hurts and concede to try it again.

Chunks of Lambert Park were in this sad state when we rode it in August.
These hardy grasses had been utterly flattened by surges of water.
These hardy grasses had been utterly flattened by surges of water.
Chunks of Lambert Park were in this sad state when we rode it in August.

Besides Big Springs Hollow, Jason and I rode many of our other usual paths this year: Lambert Park, Mill Creek Canyon, Corner Canyon and American Fork Canyon. Most of our rides were pretty uneventful with just the usual scrapes and some mouth-dropping scenery but a couple were a little more out of the norm.

Mud doesn't bother me until it clogs my gears and immobilizes my tires.
Mud doesn’t bother me until it clogs my gears and immobilizes my tires.
Goo this thick accumilated on my bike every few minutes while we were riding the shady side of American Fork Canyon.
Goo this thick accumulated on my bike every few minutes while we were riding the shady side of American Fork Canyon.

We hit Lambert Park in August, about three or four days after a rainstorm, and were quite surprised by the condition of the landscape. Some of you may recall the giant fire started near Lambert Park in 2012 that consumed a greater part of the mountain and threatened to burn a number of enormous homes. Well, due to the barren hillsides left in that blaze’s wake, what had been just a little summer rain for everyone else in the valley had become a mudslide and flooding threat for those singed foothills. We were astonished to find that the area had been disfigured by floodwaters only days before our ride. Huge expanses of bush and grass had been ripped out and washed over, parts of the trails that used to dip and rise had been leveled and thick muck had filled the gaps between the trunks of startled trees. It was boggling.

American Fork Canyon is always gorgeous when its leaves sing their annual gilded-swansong.
American Fork Canyon is always gorgeous when its leaves sing their annual gilded-swansong.
A ride up Corner Canyon early in October proved quite colorful.
A ride up Corner Canyon early in October proved quite colorful.

The last biking excursion that bears mentioning is one we took up American Fork Canyon in October. It had become uncharacteristically cold earlier that week and had snowed in the mountains. But, thanks to a few rather warm days, we thought we’d have a pleasant and snow-free ride. We were correct in assuming that there wouldn’t be much white stuff left but we ran into a different problem on the side of the mountain shaded from the sun: mud. I’m not talking about a miniscule layer of dirt that gets your toes a bit grimy, I’m talking about sludge so deep and viscous that it builds up on your tires and gears until your wheels won’t turn anymore. The most curious part of this ride was not the thick mud though but Jason’s lack of it. Anytime we go mountain biking I somehow end up 10X grubbier than him but that disparity was further amplified on this occasion. While Jason did not remain muck-free, he and his bike never looked remotely like they had been dredged up from the swamp that had swallowed me. We were biking the same trail and I weigh significantly less than him so how is it that my bicycle became so covered in filth while his only got a little splattered? I fear that some mysteries of the universe will never be solved.

The Canyon Hollow trail in Corner Canyon is a favorite of ours.
The Canyon Hollow Trail in Corner Canyon is a favorite of ours.
We went biking in Lambert Park earlier this month. The leaves littering the ground created a lovely scene and many hidden obstacles.
We went biking in Lambert Park earlier this month. The leaves littering the ground created a charming scene and many hidden obstacles.

We had a lovely, and mucky, time cycling in some picturesque surroundings this year. From the vibrant greens of spring grasses to the flaming leaves of fall, the world always looks better on the seat of a bike.

Halloween Happenings

It was a dark and stormy night…

Who doesn’t chill and thrill at the thought of Halloween? The morbid decorations, the piles of candy, the ridiculous costumes: it’s a lighthearted play on our inevitable demise that few can resist. For Jason and me, the bulk of our Halloween experiences revolve around the colossal party we throw but we always try to cram in a few extra morsels of seasonal fright when we’re not engrossed in entombing our home for that affair. This year we went to the scarier side of Cornbelly’s with our friends Adam and Abigail, yo-ho-hoed with the rest of the scurvy blaggards at a pirate gathering and made some delicious fall fixings for a distinguished gorging.

It came from the corn maze!
It came from the corn maze!
Cornbelly's is always rocking!
Cornbelly’s is always rocking!

While at Cornbelly’s with Adam and Abigail, we did lose ourselves in a corn maze, go on a hayride and watch pigs race but we were mostly fixated on the sinister side of agri-entertainment: Insanity Point. This dark corner of Cornbelly’s is devoted to spooking with several different haunts. There, amongst its ominous stalks and creepy stalkers, we let terror take hold and maliciously amuse us. We all had our moments of undignified apprehension. Adam often tried to convince Abigail to take the lead as we wandered shadowy passageways but instead she followed so closely behind us that she got stepped on or smacked every time one of us backtracked in fear. Yes, each of us shrieked that night but the highlight of my evening was hearing Jason scream like a little girl when one of the Big Top Terror clowns startled him good. It was glorious!

The Scallywag Siorre was crawling with snakes, scorpions, and tarantulas this year.
The Scallywag Soiree was crawling with snakes, scorpions, and tarantulas this year.
The snake I was given to hold was beautifully patterned but extremely wiggly. I didn't appreciate its squirming and it probably didn't appreciate mine.
The snake I was given to hold was beautifully patterned but extremely wiggly. I didn’t appreciate its squirming and it probably didn’t appreciate mine.

The Scallywag Soirée we attend every October is an elaborate pirate-themed party put on by a former employer. It makes our intensive Halloween get-together look like a pauper’s fling. This year’s swashbuckling bash held not only the usual delights of incredible props and heaps of food but also some extra creepies and crawlies. Scorpions, tarantulas and all manner of constricting serpents were brought in for the fondling. I’m not really too fond of fondling slithering beasts but I did it anyway. Time to face your fear little girl!

This scorpion seemed well-behaved enough until it made a run for it up my arm.
This scorpion seemed well-behaved enough until it made a run for it up my arm.
Amber and Jeremy were also invited to be bandits of the high seas.
Amber and Jeremy were also invited to be bandits of the high seas.

Cooking a spooky fall feast with Jason is always one of the highlights of my October. We have a blast making tasty food look disgusting. This year’s menu included: hearty pumpkin curry soup, witches’ fingers pretzels and cinnamon-sugar apple donut bites. Yum! Homemade pretzels, it turns out, are quite time-consuming to create, especially when they have to be shaped into digits, but our meal was delicious and grotesque.

These monster munchies were one of the many treats I surprised Jason with throughout the month.
These monster munchies were just one of the many treats I surprised Jason with throughout the month.
The food we made for our Halloween dinner turned out finger lickin' good.
The food we made for our Halloween dinner turned out finger lickin’ good.
We get swarms of trick-or-treaters every year. We only had five pieces of candy left from the pounds and pounds we bought.
We get swarms of trick-or-treaters every year. We only had five pieces of candy left from the pounds and pounds we bought this time.

Our own party haunts us every October but Jason and I usually slip away from that mayhem within to enjoy the chaos without a little. Between crawling through disgusting haylofts, dashing from chainsaws, caressing creatures and baking fingers, I think we had a pretty good run with chaos this year. We do always strive to remember the true meaning of Halloween: death and candy.

Hosting Halloween

Jason and I just held our annual Halloween bash. As always, it was a tremendous undertaking. The planning for this event usually begins sometime in August and escalates as it approaches. Thinking of putting on a Halloween shindig of your own? May our terrifying process convince you that that would only be lunacy. Every year is a little different but here are the 26 steps that were required to produce and recover from our festivities this time:

1. Create and order invites.
2. Buy prizes for the costume contest, bingo and various other games with all ages considered.
3. Order costume contest medals.

Jason and I went steampunk this year.
Jason and I went steampunk this year.

4. Buy fabric and sew costumes. One sentence doesn’t seem adequate to represent the work involved in this. Good thing I just made it three.
5. Tag and decorate 48 bottles of butterscotch beer as party favors for the adults.
6. Buy a piñata and its fillings. Stuff it.
7. Arrange for food. This year’s sustenance came in the form of catering from Waffle Love. They brought their delicious waffles, and waffle truck, to us.

I don't even want to acknowledge how lont it took me to tag and decorate these 48 party favors.
I don’t even want to acknowledge how long it took me to tag and decorate these 48 party favors.
Silas dressed as a possessed doll and played the part quite creepily.
Silas dressed as a possessed doll and played the part quite creepily.

8. Buy supplies for the kids’ craft table.
9. Build a custom playlist with all those Halloween favorites and some lesser-known creepy beats.
10. Buy kiddie goodie-bags plus an assortment of innards and cram them all in. This year we put together almost 40 of these bags and all but a few were given out.
11. Address and mail invites.

What a darling family.
What a darling family.

12. Gussy up costume contest prizes with ribbons, feathers, eyeballs and anything else bumpy in the night.
13. Prep craft table by constructing examples of all the finished products so that the little folk will know what they’re trying to make.
14. Go to a patch and handpick pumpkins. Paint these pumpkins black and white so guests can decorate them with chalk and decals. All this jack-o business took way too long so don’t expect it to happen again next year.

Never underestimate the eeriness the right lighting can add to a scene.
Never underestimate the eeriness the right lighting can add to a scene.
Eden took undead to the animals with her zombie cat costume.
Eden took undead to the animals with her zombie cat costume.

15. Create costume contest ballots.
16. Buy utensils, plates, napkins, drinks and all those other eating niceties.
17. Move couches, rugs, kitchen appliances, pictures, etc. upstairs or into the garage, anywhere they are out of the way.

Drew and Simone came as Dr. Who?
Drew and Simone came as Dr. Who?

18. Vacuum, dust and straighten the basement. Everything has to be tucked away somewhere to make room for the people explosion that’s about to occur.
19. Decorate, decorate, decorate, decorate, decorate, decorate, decorate, decorate, decorate, decorate, and decorate. I feel like I should say “decorate” a few dozen more times because decorating is a monster of a job. We meticulously arrange creepy cloth, candlesticks, bones, potion bottles, pumpkins, lights, ravens and so forth throughout our yard and two floors of our home. Every year we display our extensive Halloween collection differently and every year gallons of creative juices get consumed in the process.

These serving-dish fingers may be proof of a twisted mind...mine.
These serving-dish fingers may be proof of a twisted mind…mine.
This graveyard scene was a design of mine.
This graveyard scene was my design.

20. Arrange studio lights and a background to form a makeshift photo spot. I didn’t have a clue how to work and situate studio lights before this little experiment. It took some messing around and research to figure it out.
21. Rent space heaters so that the backyard can be a toasty hangout location.

Thirty-one feet of ruffles were squished into the back of this skirt.
Thirty-one feet of ruffles were squished into the back of this skirt.

22. Clean. Everything has to be spick ‘n span before it’s thrown into chaos. It’s a lot like nursing a patient back to health before serving out their death sentence.
23. Throw party!

Waffle Love catered our party via their food truck.
Waffle Love catered our party via their food truck.
Penny's no garden-variety gnome.
Penny’s no garden-variety gnome.

24. Clean up the raspberries smashed into the sidewalk, the sticky goo left on the kitchen floor, the blob of who-knows-what dripped on the carpet. Cleanup is lengthy and not especially fun.
25. Put relocated furnishings back where they came from.
26. Pack away the dozens of boxes of Halloween décor so that they are ready for the vicious cycle to begin all over again next year. (This step has not yet been completed and will still take us weeks.)

Bart and Brandi cleverly used a bulging belly to their advantage and came as Juno and Bleeker.
Bart and Brandi cleverly used a bulging belly to their advantage and came as Juno and Bleeker.

Too many steps for you to follow? Not to worry, you can come to the Sabin party and enjoy all the fun and fright without rattling your work bones. So why do we do it? The obvious answer is that we are crazy but, besides that, we love Halloween and conjuring the spooky magic of the season up for the wee ones. We also enjoy reminding adults that costumes aren’t just for kids.

I made sure this jar was crawling with centipedes. The gruesome details are never overlooked by yours truly.
I made sure this jar was crawling with centipedes. The gruesome details are never overlooked by yours truly.

This year we had considerably more help pulling this madness off than we’ve had in the past. Many thanks to Lee and Jacob for lending us a hand with basement prep one evening. Keith, thanks for the pickup service. A big thank you to Drew, Adam, Jacob and Lee for helping the kids bowl and Jenny and Simone for assisting with some of the other games. And muchas gracias to the various people that collected many of the cups and craft fragments scattered throughout our house: Abigail, Simone, Drew, Adam and Jeremy. Since Jason and I are a tiny team, any bit of assistance from others goes a long way. Maybe we aren’t quite mad yet…