Some of you may have heard of a little get-together called Comic-Con; it’s just a small gathering of over 100,000 of the world’s biggest geeks. Even if you haven’t been living in a cave long enough to know about Comic-Con, surely you have heard of RowleyCon. RowleyCon is an illustrious multiday event where the geeky 1337 are invited to work up a gaming sweat (deodorant optional) and compete for uber status. It’s sure to become the hottest thing on the nerd radar since D&D.
Our friend Jeremy Rowley is a gaming aficionado extraordinaire and he decided that instead of going to Comic-Con he was going to bring the Con to him. He and his wife Amber hosted a weekend teeming with everything nerd: board games, Star Craft II, DDR, Dance Central, and even some classic Nintendo games.
Not underwear on the head...but close. This brilliant, yet somewhat disturbing, Batman costume was all my idea but I still have to give Jason props for having the confidence to wear it. A nerd party without Star Trek is like a Klingon without a bat'leth. I wore my Starfleet uniform on Friday so this get-together wouldn't be lacking an essential ingredient.
Since competitions were held in every gaming category, and used to determine not only each division’s champion but an overall mega geek, I decided I had better become somewhat familiar with all of these geeky pursuits so I could at least lose at RowleyCon with dignity. My desire to not be the suckiest led to Jason teaching me how to play Star Craft II. I had never played this game before last week but he taught me enough that I could give the impression that I knew what I was doing as I lost miserably. To be beaten gracefully was all I was hoping for; I seriously doubted I had the sweet skills necessary to win a round. But somehow, despite my minimal aptitude, I did manage to whip Jacob’s Terran hinny during the tournament even though he owns this game. (No Jacob, the force is not with you.)
Jason was also undefeated at DDR...until he played me. Wahahaha!Jeremy is a DDR head. Good thing I didn't have to go head to head with that head or I wouldn't have ended up ahead.Jacob wasted everyone at Duck Hunt. I'm glad he didn't play every game as pathetically as he played Star Craft.
There was one competition that I definitely didn’t need anyone’s assistance training for: Dance Dance Revolution, AKA DDR. While I am certainly no expert at this game, the hardcore DDRers would step all over my face, I can dance dance good enough to impress the easily wowed. I ended up winning the DDR competition undefeated. Good thing Jeremy excluded himself from the contest; that boy is unnatural when it comes to DDR. I never would have beaten him.
On Saturday Jason and I both dressed in a steampunk motif. Jason made a pretty great airship captain.It only took some slight modifications to turn my Halloween costume from last year into a steampunk masterpiece.
My esteemed teacher, Jason, won the Star Craft tournament. He technically got second place but the first place winner, Adam, won the title of uber nerd making him ineligible for a Star Craft winning too. Surprisingly, I actually gamed my way into a close second place for overall nerd. Dang that Adam! If only I had been proclaimed the biggest geek in the world then I could have retreated to Valinor satisfied.
Andrew beat me, Jason, and Simone at Dominion. Maybe being the world's slowest Dominion player has its advantages.The Small World contest was intense. I believe Adam's races slaughtered the other contenders.Jason's brother was very popular with the Rowleys' cat. I think Mel wanted to live in his beard.
Even if I didn’t vanquish all the other gamers at least Jason and I won the prizes for best costume. The competition was really tough…okay, so Jas and I were the only ones that dressed up and consequently we could have just worn underwear on our heads and won…oh wait, that’s pretty close to what happened-just kidding. Although tighty whities may have been involved we actually did put together some pretty cool costumes at the last minute using pieces of costumes I had made previously and a few new accessories. With a little creativity we each ended up with two different outfits so we could wear unique attire on both nights of RowleyCon.
Jason's goggles made his big blue eyes look bigger, brighter, and bluer...and totally screwball.
RowleyCon was a little chaotic, with an abundance of tournaments going on simultaneously and sometimes haphazardly, but it was a lot of fun. It was also very refreshing not to be in charge of this party; being guests instead of hosts was a nice change. We are looking forward to geeking it up again next year. You nerds are going down!
Boys have feet; that is a generally accepted fact. Almost equally accepted is the belief that boys’ feet are usually in need of some hygienic or cosmetic care. Many women complain that their man’s feet are too dry, stinky, or hairy; toe nails that are ridiculously long or unruly seem to be another common grievance. The stench of man hath no cure but have you men ever considered getting a pedicure to fix everything else? I’m guessing probably not.
For some reason nearly all men are under the impression that they are far too manly to get a pedicure. To that I say, first of all, that you aren’t nearly as manly as you think you are and secondly, having feet as coarse as sandpaper does not enhance your manliness. Just ask your lady if she would like to get cozy with your gritty, cracked, neglected stumps; I think you know what her answer will be.
Last Saturday my sister-in-law and I went to get a pedicure at my favorite pedicure place, The Clique, and my little brother Drew, either because of some wifely pressure or simply because he was sick of having feet like Frodo Baggins, came with us.
It's a tough life. Drew had to relax in a chair and submit to being pampered. It's no wonder that so many men avoid similar torture.
So was it enormously straining on him to sit in a comfy chair while someone massaged his furry legs and meticulously scrubbed his feet until they looked like they actually belonged to a human? Not surprisingly, the answer is no. He relaxed and read a book while he was being spoiled and sanitized, not a real book of course but a book that was loaded on his cell phone. This combining of the nerd world and the world of hygiene didn’t cause a warp core breach; so yes, you men can be geeky and groomed and even geeky while being groomed without fear of losing your containment field.
More of you chaps should follow Drew’s lead. You won’t come away from a pedicure with glittery red toenails-unless that’s your heart’s desire. Would it be so bad to have feet that are clean and pampered and don’t scream neglect? What’s so feminine about that?
Jason and I just went down to Moab…again. Nope, we never get tired of that awesome place.
On this trip we wanted to experience some Moab classics. We hiked to Corona and Bowtie Arches and climbed up Negro Bill Canyon to Morning Glory Bridge. (That’s the canyon’s official name. All you political correctness enforcers need to just close your gaping mouths and deal with it. Everyone, including African-Americans, wants this name left as is because of the historical significance of this Bill fellow so just chill.) We also biked up to the Gemini Bridges and through a large portion of the Moab Brand trail system. We had a great time, though the weather was as moody as a teenage girl and ranged from perfectly sunny 70s to a windy downpour.
Corona Arch is graceful and stunning...and windy.Jason took this great picture of a hardy desert bloomer while we were hiking to Corona Arch. I love it!
The hike to Corona and Bowtie Arches was delightful and scenic. This short jaunt is very family friendly. Parts of it go up a short cliff face, which you scale with the help of a cable and a little ladder. While the ladder is pretty much unnecessary, I skipped it and just trekked over the adjacent rock, I think kids would love the adventurous nature of this climb. Also, the trail is only 3 miles long roundtrip so you probably won’t have to listen to fatigue-induced incessant whining from your young’ins while traversing it.
Morning Glory Bridge didn't look too impressive until you got right under it. Then you really grasped its bulk.
Negro Bill Canyon was not nearly as scenic as the arches’ hike; the best thing it had going for it was a lovely stream that crisscrossed the trail multiple times. In addition to not being as pretty, it was also way too crowded for my taste. When I go out in nature I like to enjoy nature…not dozens of people meandering around. Thank goodness for laziness! The higher we got in the canyon the less we saw other humans. We got to enjoy the Morning Glory Bridge, the sixth longest natural bridge in the United States, in seclusion. This bridge is situated on one side of a sheltering cove formed by a semicircle of rock walls. With a bubbling spring slipping out of a crack in the stone filling this recess with its echoes, it was serene setting for a snack break and I’m glad we had it all to ourselves. As we were descending the canyon a storm was quickly moving in overhead. The wind gained angry momentum and we knew that we weren’t likely to make it back to our car without getting wet but the storm’s imminence did have the beneficial side effect of scaring off other climbers. We saw next to no one the whole way down.
Beneath this overhang Jason and I watched the sky burst. I can't imagine a lovelier spot to witness a storm.My feet were more than a little on the red side when I got out of the creek but I was grinning from ear to ear.
Since it wasn’t exactly a warm day, Jason and I had crossed the canyon’s creek over and over on rocks and had not so much as dipped our toes in. Apparently, a chance to wade into this stream is the major incentive for throngs of people to ascend this canyon in the summer and, although there was absolutely no sweltering going on that day as the harsh wind rampaged up the ravine, I was determined not to return to the car without letting my feet go for a swim. Although Jason thought my plans for submergence bordered on lunacy, he agreed to stop with me at a pretty spot where the stream cascaded over a small waterfall so I could dabble in the water. The instant Jason and I sat down under a mass of rock adjacent to the creek, which had been carved into a C shape by many years of flowing water, the sky let loose but this sudden shower didn’t deviate me from my plan. I replaced my hiking shoes with sandals and let the rain trickle over me as I wandered through the brook’s clear cold waters and then sat with Jason under the overhanging boulder when the downpour became torrential. It was absolutely sublime, and one of my very favorite Moab moments, sitting beneath that protective precipice watching the rain shoot over the rocks above us and the pristine stream turn into a chaotic puddle as the ripples from endless raindrops battled for a piece of its surface. The smell of rain mingling with the scent of desert plants was intoxicating and unlike any odor I have encountered before. Wow! After about 15 minutes the cloudburst stopped and we were able to continue our hike while still enjoying the fragrance of a thirsty land awakened by the touch of moisture. The deluge began again when we were just about a minute or two from our car; we were awfully lucky.
The view from the top of that extremely long hill we climbed was pretty great but I don't know if it was worth all that work.Coming back on the Gemini Bridges road I hit a patch of sand that was unexpectedly deep. It made my bike slide sideways in a straight path to some bedrock. I narrowly missed smashing my head into that stone by making a hasty exodus from my seat. I thought this jump was extremely ungraceful but Jason said the quickness of my reaction was a thing of beauty. I managed to come away from the incidence with just a few scrapes and a slightly twisted ankle.
We have considered biking the path to Gemini Bridges for many years. This Moab classic follows a jeep road back to this famous landmark and is extremely popular with ATVs, 4x4s, and bikers. I think about half the scouters in the world have ridden this trail. So why, in all our trips to Moab, hadn’t we done it? Our handy dandy Moab biking book said this trail was relatively easy when ridden as a one-way with a shuttle but as an out-and-back it becomes a nearly 16 mile behemoth due to a long and steep climb at its start. In short, we were scared away by this fearsome assessment since we only ever take one car to Moab, making shuttling impossible. This time though we decided to conquer Gemini Bridges anyway and tell that hill where it could stick it. It turned out to be a great ride. The rise at the beginning was a monster but it wasn’t that bad; we’ve ridden much, much worse. Gemini’s dirt road wasn’t as much fun to bike as some of the other trails we’ve done in Moab but it was challenging enough not to be completely boring. Also, it traveled through some very scenic areas and over patches of slickrock, so we did get to satisfy some of our slickrock cravings. The bridges themselves were awing and a bit scary. With nearly a 250 foot drop on both sides of these twins and between them, it’s no wonder that there have been so many fatalities in the area.
The bridges made me really nervous. Jason is standing on one of them here-just a thin line between two colossal drops. From this view you can better appreciate the immensity of those cliffs.That peculiar formation is called Gooney Bird Rock. It looked like a goofy sentinel watching all the passing riders.
The last day we were in Moab we decided to bike some of the Moab Brand Trails. I never knew these trails existed but apparently Jason has known about them forever and ever. Just a few miles out of Moab this trail system offers plenty of tasty loop options for many levels of riders. However, I should warn the familial thrill seekers that most of this terrain is probably too difficult for little kids. We took the Bar M loop to the Rockin’ A trail first. Rockin’ A was supposed to be a tricky rock-hopping ride over slickrock. It was tricky alright. I wish I could say that I enjoyed this route but alas, I did not. The first bit was pretty fun but the last third was way too bumpy and ledge littered for my tastes. Bear in mind that this review is coming from someone who has conquered the Slickrock Trail, Tusher Canyon, Bartlett Wash, etc. etc. etc. I am no biking sissy but Rockin’ A was too technical to be fun for me and even crazy Jason thought it was too rough. After Rockin’ A I decided that I had had my fill of slickrock for a while so we opted to next ride the Lazy EZ loop, a fantastic singletrack, through some gorgeous desert. The fiery sand and sparse desert foliage in this area was crowned by rims of brown and white boulders making the scenery look more like a movie set than a real landscape. Our winding bike trail looked very much out of place amongst these surroundings; the only human hands you could envision in this untouched place were maybe John Wayne’s. An enormous number of cactuses, many of them just inches from the trail, added a degree of danger to this path since even the tiniest misstep could lead to planting yourself in a cactus plant. This was an excellent ride and I think it would make a nice introduction to singletracks for those looking to narrow the girth of their tread.
This quick shot turned out great; I took it on the Lazy EZ loop.
Moab was fantastic as always. We enjoyed exploring some of the trails and areas we had heard so much about. The weather was a little temperamental but, considering it snowed here in Salt Lake City while we were gone, I guess we can’t really complain.
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