Jason and I typically host a small but unruly Christmas gathering every year. Given that we were opposed to spreading COVID quicker than holiday cheer, we opted to celebrate with friends outside in a non-scattering way last December. This forced the festivities to be organized at the last minute when weather could be predicted. I am a planner not a procrastinator, so I was repulsed by my own stalling. How did going against the core of who I am work out? Better than I thought possible.

Since Jason and I knew throwing our usual Christmas party would not be a responsible option for 2020, we debated between holding something outdoors where attendees could stay far from each other or just canceling the event altogether. After all, December isn’t known for its pleasant demeanor, and I don’t think Jack Frost would make a congenial party guest. We waited and watched the weather. When an agreeable Saturday showed up in the forecast, I leapt into action and began tackling party tasks quickly.

With just a week’s notice, we assumed few friends would show up for our impromptu shindig. We were wrong. Attendees totaled 15, which was nearly everyone invited. Initially, I arranged for the event to take place in a restaurant’s outdoor seating area. Eventually, we moved it to a nearby park because our anticipated group size got too large for the restaurant to put each household at a separate table. The menu remained the same despite the change in location, thanks to the versatility of takeout. From short rib hash to eggs benedict, we all enjoyed our alfresco meals.

Jason and I also ordered hot chocolate and various other scalding drinks from Starbucks in an attempt to keep everyone warm. The gesture, although tasty, proved unnecessary. Temperatures never rose above 39 degrees, but continual sunshine and absentee wind augmented weather satisfaction. Also, because we were all starved for social interaction, we probably would have contentedly sat through a manta ray blizzard. The group chatted for three hours, much longer than expected.

I compiled a white elephant video to make a contactless and distant exchange possible. It altered this tradition slightly but by no means impaired the absurdity at its heart.

I’m not the dallying type. The procrastination required for this affair did force me to question my place in the universe, but it didn’t make the event unsuccessful. And thankfully, our careful last-minute planning kept everyone well. Getting COVID for Christmas could be worse than getting a lump of coal.

In keeping with the recommendations of health officials, last November Jason and I decided not to spend Thanksgiving with anyone but each other. While we missed our families, this odd arrangement did have a few advantages. This was the first year of the many we’ve been married in which Thanksgiving was not a blur of travel and intake. Plus, we were still able to connect with family members through a little technological resourcefulness. All in all, it was a peculiar but pleasant holiday.

As mentioned above, our resolve to be responsible with our Thanksgiving celebrations did have some perks. So, let’s talk perks. We got to try making dressing for the first time ever, a successful experiment. Also, we had delicious leftovers for a week and a half. At the expense of our BMI, we made it through all of them. Additionally, there were no timelines or schedules. After years of hitting two family meals on the same day, our holiday felt relaxing even though we were cooking a full Thanksgiving dinner. That’s an indication of how busy our Thanksgivings tend to be.

Surprisingly, although it was our first attempt at preparing a Thanksgiving feast, all of our food finished together on time. We had cranberry sauce, dressing, candied yams, smoked turkey, caramel apple pie, and sweet potato pie. Everything was made from scratch by us except the turkey and caramel apple pie. If someone wants to smoke a turkey for me, I won’t say no.

Since I am usually the dessert peddler at my family’s Thanksgiving gorging, Jason and I opted to give our families a little sweetness this year notwithstanding the bitter circumstances. We ordered nine apple pies from our favorite bakery and delivered one to each of our family members the day before the holiday in what we called our Pie Circuit. We stopped on lawns to talk with our relatives, so these simple deliveries took over five hours. I always think I’m going to start cooking for Thanksgiving early the day before, but I never do.

Jason and I also organized video calls and party games with both our families as a way to stay connected during our disconnection. Similarly, we planned a tournament for the game That’s Pretty Clever. Yup, that’s pretty clever.

Thanksgiving should conjure reflections of gratitude. This year, I was most grateful for my sole meal companion, who also happens to be one amazing hubby. I was also thankful for the technology that made moments of laughter and support with family still possible. However, after this unavoidably solitary Thanksgiving, I’m not sure I’m going to be able to go back to the double-family trauma. Holiday festivities don’t have to happen on actual holidays. Maybe the family togetherness can be spread out instead of occurring all together? I’m just saying.